War in Ukraine

Everything was packed, explosions echoed outside, yet, for some reason, we didn’t leave. We just couldn’t. Finally, I realized we were paralyzed, grabbed the suitcases myself, went down to the car, and started loading them into the trunk.

They spoke loudly, as if they wanted to be heard and seen. I didn't pay much attention, although, of course, I was very curious about the topic of border crossings. But I thought, What's the point of these conversations and opinions? I'll go wherever I need to, no matter what.

I stood there, trying to enjoy the sun. Suddenly, a car stopped and parked on the other side. The window rolled down, and I saw my friend’s husband. I couldn’t believe my eyes and froze in place.

The conflict grew louder as another police car arrived, and they started yelling at the man in the Mercedes through loudspeakers. The man tried to negotiate with them and with me. But his demeanor was so intimidating that I didn’t dare to open my window. I was afraid that if he had a gun, he might use it in his panic.

Throughout this journey, if I may call it that, I acutely felt the impact of daylight and its absence on my mental and emotional state. Each night in the car, it seemed like dawn would never come. Sometimes, I thought it would never come at all.

My mother got out of the car with one wish — to smoke and drink coffee. She went to the first table and asked for coffee. The young man looked at her and, as he poured a bowl of hot soup, said: "First, you should eat. Then, coffee".